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| Name: |
architect
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| Subject: |
Some aspects of aging
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Date:
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8/13/2011 2:00:01 PM (updated 8/13/2011 2:01:49 PM)
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You are less likely to be kidnapped.
In a hostage situation you are likely to be one of the first released.
No one expects you to even walk anywhere fast, much less run.
The first words of a caller at 9:30 AM are "Did I wake you up?"
The first words of a caller at 9:30 PM are "Did I wake you up?"
People no longer accuse you of being a hypochondriac.
You have nothing left to learn the hard way.
A lot of what you buy now won't wear out before you no longer need it.
Nobody thinks it's strange if you eat supper at 4:30 in the afternoon.
You can manage to get along without sex but not without your glasses.
You get into heated arguments about pension plans, social security and medicare
You no longer think of posted speed limits as a dare.
You no longer try to hold your stomach in no matter who walks by.
You hum along with elevator music.
Your eyesight has probably gotten as bad as it will ever get.
All that money you "wasted" paying into health insurance is beginning to look like a pretty good "investment".
Your joints do a better job of forecasting the weather than the meteorologists at the National Weather Service.
Your deepest secrets are safe with your friends...they will forget them too.
Your supply of brain cells has been reduced to a very manageable number.
Within a day you will forget this list and where it came from.
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BUT DO REMEMBER THIS!!! NEVER EVER UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES TAKE A SLEEPING PILL AND A LAXITIVE ON THE SAME NIGHT JUST BEFORE GOING TO BED!!
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