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| Name: |
HubCap
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| Subject: |
Talking Dog
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Date:
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2/7/2013 7:28:21 AM
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A guy is driving around the back woods of Montana and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale 'He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard.
The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there.
'You talk?' he asks.
'Yep,' the Lab replies.
After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says 'So,what's your story?'
The Lab looks up and says, 'Well, Idiscovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA.
In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.'
'I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running...
But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.'
'I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired.'
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.
'Ten dollars,' the guy says.
'Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?'
'Because he's a Bullshitter. He's never been out of the yard' |
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| Name: |
architect
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| Subject: |
Talking Dog
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Date:
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2/7/2013 6:53:00 PM
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Billy Bob reads in the local paper that a talent scout is in town looking for acts to put on TV. He takes his talking dog Leroy to audition. The talent scout inquires as to the talent he claims for Leroy. Billy Bob explains that Leroy can talk and he will demonstrate by asking the dog some questions and he will answer. The talent scout says "I'm skeptical but go ahead." Billy Bob asks "Leroy what keep rain out of the house?" Leroy barks his answer "ROOF ROOF". The talent scout only slightly smiles. Billy Bob continues "Leroy finish this sentence, My favorite candy bar is a Baby....?." Leroy barks "RUTH RUTH". The talent scout scowls. Billy Bob goes on "Leroy who was the greatest home run hitter of all time"? Instantly Leroy barks "RUTH RUTH". The talent scout explodes "You and your flea bag hound get out of here...that is no more a talking dog than I am a brain surgeon!"
On the way home Leroy is laying on the floor of the pickup. Billy Bob looks down and says "Don't be sad Leroy, that so called talent scout may not like you but your still my best friend." Leroy looks up with sad eyes and says "Billy Bob, I'm really sorry I didn't remember to say 'HANK AARON' on that last one."
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