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| Name: |
architect
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| Subject: |
2013 Darwin Awards
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Date:
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8/30/2013 4:57:10 PM (updated 8/30/2013 5:01:27 PM)
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it is that magical time of year when the Darwin Awards are presented, honoring the least evolved among us.
Here are some of the runners up:
At a restaurant in Switzerland a chef lost a finger when a meat cutting machine mal-functioned. The chef submitted a claim to the restaurant's insurance company. The company suspected negligence or even fraud and sent an investigator. The chef explained what he was doing when the machine cut his finger off. The investigator listened and indicated he would like to try and duplicate the event. Sure enough...he also cut off his finger. The claim was approved.
A man in Chicago shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car in front of his house. He then went back down the block to get his car. When he returned a woman was pulling into the space. Quite understandably he shot her.
A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, picked out a candy bar and put it and $20 bill on the counter. When the clerk opened the cash register to give him change the man pulled a gun and told the clerk to give him all the money in the cash register drawer. The clerk promptly complied. The man took the money and fled the store leaving the $20 bill and candy bar on the counter. The amount of cash in the drawer was $17.00. (if you pull a gun on somebody then give them $3.00 have you committed a crime?)
As woman shopper left a Brooklyn bodega man grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 and police arrived within 2 minutes. The woman was able to give a very precise description of the thief and within 10 minutes police had picked up a suspect a few blocks away. He was brought back to the store. When he asked why he was told it was to get positive identification. He immediately replied "Yeah man, that's her, that's the old lady i took the purse from."
The Ann Arbor News reported that a man walked into an Ypsilanti Burger King at 5:00 AM, pulled a gun and demanded cash. The clerk told him he couldn't open the cash drawer unless he entered a food order. The man ordered onion rings and the clerk said they were not a breakfast item and would not be available until after 11:00AM. He then ordered French fries only to get the same answer. Frustrated, the man walked away. (This received the 5-star special award for stupidity)
And the Grand Prize Winner for 2013:
When the 38 revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a Long Beach, CA hold up, the would be robber, James Elliot, did something that can only inspire wonder...he peered down the barrel of the gun and pulled the trigger again. This time it worked like a charm!!
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