Grew up on the Jersey shore and lived there until 1989. You are right, most people don't retire there, because they can't afford to. NJ has a high cost of living and the winters can be challenging when you don't like to shovel snow. Nothing against the South, I've lived here for 11 years, but I would move back to NJ if I needed to. I owned a house there and that doubled in value when i sold it 9 years later. The taxes are high, because the schools are better and there are many more services offered. I'm not saying it is the ideal place to live, but it isn't bad.
NJ has proximity to NYC if cultural activities are your thing, but it is not all Newark and Camden. The central western part of the state around Princeton and Frenchtown is very nice.
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