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Name:
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HubCap
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Subject:
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Murder @ Wal-Mart
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Date:
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7/7/2011 12:04:57 PM
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Murder @ Wal-Mart
> Tired of constantly being broke & stuck in an unhappy marriage, a young
husband decided to solve both problems by taking out a large insurance policy on
his wife with himself as the beneficiary, and then arranging to have her killed.
>
>
> A 'friend of a friend' put him in touch with a nefarious dark-side underworld
figure who went by the name of 'Artie.'
> Artie explained to the husband that his going price for snuffing out a spouse
was $5,000.
>
> The husband said he was willing to pay that amount, but that he wouldn't have
any cash on hand until he could collect his wife's insurance money. Artie
insisted on being paid at least something up front, so the man opened
> his wallet, displaying the single dollar bill that rested inside.Artie sighed,
rolled his eyes, & reluctantly agreed to accept the dollar as down payment for
the dirty deed.
>
>
> A few days later, Artie followed the man's wife to the local Super Wal-Mart
store. There, he surprised her in the produce department & proceeded to strangle
her with his gloved hands. As the poor unsuspecting woman drew her last breath &
slumped to the floor, the manager of the produce department stumbled
unexpectedly onto the murder scene. Unwilling to leave any living witnesses
behind, ol' Artie had no choice but to strangle the produce manager as well.
>
> However, unknown to Artie, the entire proceedings were captured by the hidden
security cameras & observed by the store's security guard, who immediately
called the police. Artie was caught and arrested before he could even leave the
store.
>
> Under intense questioning at the police station, Artie revealed the whole
sordid plan,including his unusual financial arrangements with the hapless
husband who was also quickly arrested.
>
>
> The next day in the
> newspaper, the headline declared...
> 'ARTIE CHOKES 2 for $1.00 @ WAL-MART!'
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