Name:   MAJ USA RET - Subject:   A Plan for Global Warming Date:   7/21/2022 5:57:01 PM (updated 7/21/2022 6:00:33 PM)

If you believe in anthropomorphic global warming (AGW), you agree to sign a lifetime contract with your belief in AGW as its governing clause. Such that:

1. You must own your home. (no government subsidy)
2. You must disconnect from the power grid and power your home using only wind generation and solar panels purchased by you without any government subsidy.
3. You may not have a fireplace, woodstove, gas grill, charcoal grill, or any other heat generating device which emits carbon compounds.
4. You must forfeit ownership of any vehicle, lawn equipment, or power tools not powered by electricity.
5. You must retain any batteries after their useful life.
6. You cannot eat meat or wear any leather products (methane abatement).
7. You must swear allegiance to the Democratic Party and vote ONLY Democratic.
8. Your children must be educated in public school or you must put them up for adoption.
9. If you violate ANY of the above clauses, you are required to relocate you and your family to any communist country and renounce your US citizenship (and we the people will be happy to pay any renunciation fees).
10. You may not own a firearm (nobody will want what you have anyway).

(I am having way too much fun with this.)