1/ You can avoid cutting yourself when cutting vegetables if you have one of your kids hold the vegetable while you do the blade work.
2/ You can avoid arguments with your wife about lowering and lifting the toilet seat if you pee in the sink.
3/ The cheap way to relieve high blood pressure...cut your self a little from time to time and bleed a few minutes. Don't over do it...use a timer.
4/ If you put a mouse trap on top of your alarm clock you will cure yourself of rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.
5/ If you have a bad cough take a really big dose of laxative...you will be afraid to cough!!!
6/ You only need three tools...WD-40, duct tape and a hammer. If it is supposed to move and won't use your WD-40, if it is not supposed to move but does use your duct tape. As for the hammer see below.
7/ If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem.
Thought for the day...Some people are like a slinky, not really good for anything but they bring a smile to everybody's face when somebody pushes them down the steps.