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| Name: |
oneshot
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| Subject: |
Devil Dog
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Date:
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4/6/2009 12:18:39 PM
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A guy was driving around the back woods of Tennessee and he saw a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talkin' Dawg fer Sale '..
He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes into the back yard and sees a nice looking Beagle sitting there.
'You talk?' he asks.
'Yep,' the Beagle replies.
After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says 'So, what's your story?'
The Beagle looks up and says, 'Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA and they had me sworn into the toughest branch of the armed services...the United States Marines. You know one of their nicknames is 'The Devil Dogs.'
'In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders; because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running, but the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger. So, I decided to settle down.'
'I retired from the Corps (8 dog years is 56 Corps years) and signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals. I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired.'
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.
'Ten dollars,' the guy says.
'Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?'
'Because he's such a bulls*****er ... He never did any of that crap. He was in the Navy!'
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| Name: |
architect
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| Subject: |
Devil Dog
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Date:
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4/6/2009 9:22:43 PM
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Then there was the good ole boy Clabus from the hills of north Ga. who takes his dog Goober down to Atlanta and enters him in a pet talent competition as Goober the talking dog. The contest officials instruct Clabus to demonstrate Goober's skills. Clabus say "Goober name a woman from the Bible" Goober quickly barks out "RUTH...RUTH". He then says "what's on top of the house that keeps the water out?" Goober barks "ROOF...ROOF". Then "Goober who was the greatest baseball homerun hitter of all time?" The reply "RUTH...RUTH". The officials aren't amused and proclaim Clabus is a fraud and that Goober is barking not talking! Goober and Clabus are tossed out on the street. On the way back to the hills in his old pickup Clabus looks down at Goober and says "Don't you worry a dern bit Goober, them city boys might not take to ye much, but you is still my goodest friend". Goober looks up from the floor board and says "Dang Clabus, you should told me afore hand to answer Aaron on that las question".
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